Dating Chronicles # 4, Tank

1999 Junior Year Multiple times

The day after I broke it off with JMR, I was hanging with Tank. He had his eye on me since the beginning of the school year. I brushed him off mostly thinking, why is this short kid keep talking to me? I’m not sure what changed my mind about him…maybe he had a cute friend? Somehow, we all ended up going out in a big group and that is when I started to like him. So the night that JMR and I break up, I call Tank to let him know that I was single. He was ecstatic and asked if I wanted to hang out with him the next day after school.

We ended up going back to his house...make out city. Sad thing is, it was painful. He opened his mouth, placed his teeth on the side of my mouth, dug in, and just used his tongue…ouch! I had teeth marks. I gently pushed him away and asked if we could use more lips. He did for a few minutes and then it was back to teeth being dug into the side of my mouth. It did not last long at all.

Our relationship was more like a friendship; I loved hanging with him and talking to him. Actually I don’t think I consider him a relationship. We dated 2 times junior year for a couple weeks at a time, and both times he broke up with me saying he didn’t have enough time for me…jerk!

It was after we “broke up” that our friendship really grew. We would spend hours together, talking, laughing, and goofing around. He was someone that I felt comfortable around and we understood each other. Even while in other relationships and through college we stayed close. We went to school about 45 min away from each other and would visit often. He even came to one of my sohoritie’s dances.

There was always some sort of chemistry between us. Maybe our friendship was borderline inappropriate. We would hold hands, sleep in the same bed, and cuddle (while in relationships) but nothing ever came from it. We did promise to be each other’s backups though… I think that kicks in @ 35 or 37?

Our senior year of college, he was going to DC for an internship. He came to visit me at school one last time before going. He had been talking about us and our future. I had just broken up with a boyfriend, and was semi seeing someone else already…I’m a serial dater! I was such a jack ass to him- I didn’t want to give him the wrong idea. I just wanted us to stay friends. Somehow, we ended up making out that night (It so hard for me to resist at times). His kissing skills had stil not improved all that much. I was done.

The next morning, as he was leaving, he asked if I’d consider waiting for him; that when he came back, we could work on an “us.” So that I didn’t crush his feelings, I said I would consider. I mean after all, I did really care for him and loved spending time with him.

We didn’t talk that much while he was gone, mostly on purpose on my part. I had started dating the ex again and didn’t want to tell him. When he came home, we insta returned back to our friendship. There was very little talk about an “us,” he had his mind set on moving to DC. According to him, it’d be bad to start any relationship at that point, since he was leaving.

He did move to DC; he lived there for 2 years I think. In that time, our friendship faded into the background. We’d catch up every so often, but it was different. We’d hang out when he come home, but it was almost awkward between us.

When he told me he was moving back home, I was excited, thinking that we could rekindle our friendship. I was wrong, very wrong! When he came home, he had changed. In DC he explored and found his Latino side. Now, he could only date Latina women, everyone else was below him. Of course he found a Latina and they are now in love. I do miss our friendship, our talks, walks, jokes, and laughs. I’m just happy to have all the memories…