Little Sicily Shares All...





Sunday, December 27, 2009

Dating Chronicles # 12, What the hell was I thinking?


June 2005, age 22

I think that we all have one person that we date in our lives that no matter how many times we think about about the relationship, it just makes no sense that you would have ever dated them...Meet Topher I met him on Myspace (bad), he had no money (real bad), he didn't have a car (very bad)...and, he was an ASSHOLE!!! No redeeming qualities what so ever.

I met him at a time in my life when I felt alone, sad, and desperate. James and I were done- I was looking for something totally different. All the red flags didn't mean anything to me, I just wanted someone.

This guy made me more depressed than I was to begin with. He would say mean things to me- such as: "I can't believe you dated black guys, girls that date black guys are so trashy." He would tell me I was stupid, and I actually believed him at a point.

I knew that this was turning bad when he yelled at me for 45 min about not believing that it took me 40 min to drive home...hell it's Chicago and there is traffic. It doesn't matter that id is less than 10 miles away.

I finally couldn't take it anymore...we got into a fight and I got out of the car- that was pretty much the end of it. It last way too long (3-4 months maybe). And I regretted (for a long time) not cheating on him. I know that sounds super shady, but somewhere in the middle of being with him- James came back into town...still trying for us to work it out. I remember being in this hotel room- pushed up against the wall- pushing him off of me because I had a boyfriend now.

I remember that moment as if it was yesterday...until I found out that James was actually with his now wife at the time- I thought that could of gotten us back together...ha. Needless to say, I no longer regret it!

I was young and stupid and had horrible taste in guys...

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